Friday, November 2, 2012

November is Adoption Awareness Month...oh and some other cool things!



Yes, it's that time of the year again...Adoption Awareness Month! Are you hosting an Orphan Sunday gathering? Thinking of sponsoring a child? Contemplating adopting? Maybe foster care? There are so many ways to be involved in the lives of orphans, make a change for them and the world...put a dent in that epidemic number of 147 million orphans! But mostly, you will be the hands and feet of Christ!

"Religion that is pure and genuine, acceptable to God is this, to care for the widow and orphan in their distress and to keep ones self undefiled from the world." James 1:27

Get involved! Many families, ours included, need help with adoption! Or check out Worldvision or Compassion International to sponsor children....

Ok, plug is over! Now to business:)

So excited to announce that we are beginning the legal process of our adoption in Haiti! Our dossier has entered the IBESR in Haiti and is awaiting Presidential Dispensation. This could take awhile, possibly up to 9 months, but we will pray for much faster! After that our paperwork moves into the court system and we get a court date! Hopefully soon after that we will be making arrangements to bring the boys home!!!

On November 21, we have an appointment to file our I600 petition to request an orphan as an immediate member of our family! Yay! We get to travel to Haiti for this appointment and the great thing is we get to spend time with our boys! The doubly great thing is Tayler gets to go with us and spend time with his little brothers!

I get the privilege of traveling to Haiti November 2 (today!) for 8 days with a team from our church, Shadow Mountain Church. We will be ministering to the needs of the people in a smaller town called Danda. Then after coming home on the 10th, I get to fly out again a week later back to Haiti for our adoption and the appointment...I literally will be Haitian for half the month of November! I'm going to need December off to recoup from all the flying!

On a more serious note:

Adoption is a long process, tiring and can be emotionally draining. I have read comments on Facebook or blogs where people say, "I'd love to adopt, but it is expensive and the process is too long." All I can say to encourage those people is that if God calls you to it, He will pull you through it. Had we not responded to the call God put upon us to adopt, Daniel and I would never had seen Him work in ways that we've never experienced before! If you want to see God work, do nothing short of miraculous, then do what He is calling you to do...whatever it may be! Nothing with build your trust in the LORD faster than taking a risky step of faith...

God bless to all our prayer warriors and supporters! Check out our coffee shop link on this blog if you are looking for ways to support us!

In Christ,
Terry

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Two Is Not a Crowd...

Some exciting, and unexpected news!

Upon receiving our uscis approval on Monday, some amazing things have happened! I noticed that on our approval, the uscis approved us to bring home 2 male children, and it got me thinking about another boy that we met when we were in Haiti. He was small, a little withdrawn and had suffered from what appeared to be possible malnutrition in his infant years. I estimate him to be about 8 years old now.

I immediately began talking to Daniel about it. What if God wants us to really bring home two? Could we say no to God? Those of you who know me and Daniel, know that we try not to ignore the Lord when we hear his calling.

I spent two days in hefty prayer, turning things over to God, asking to just remain in His will for us and the adoption and specifically asking to not be bitter if Gods answer was no. I knew what I wanted, but I want Gods will more and left the final decision up to Daniel.

Daniel is a hard facts person, so after inquiring into additional cost and how we were going to house an extra child, he told our daughter, Kaley, "God wants us to bring two home. How can we say no?"

So two days later, we have decided to expand our family a little bit more. We aren't bringing home just our one little guy, but two!

I had had a feeling we weren't done adopting, but never would have guessed it would be before we even completed our first!

So prayers are greatly appreciated as we take on a little more load, but we are ecstatic God has called us upon this great adventure of adopting. I have already emailed our family coordinator and hope to have our new additions paperwork soon.

Much love to all our supporters and prayer warriors.

God bless,
Terry

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Oh Happy Days!

I have not posted as often as earlier in our adoption process, mainly because the last three months have been fraught with frustration for us. We have been dealing with a lot of miscommunication and misunderstandings as we have tried to receive approval for our fingerprinting and background checks.

I didn't want to bog people down with the stress and amount of down-heartedness that we have been feeling. ( although a few of you have been faithful and have walked beside us during this time and we thank you and love you!) We have suffered for three months trying to put the finishing touches on our dossier. Well, I can finally say the finish line is in sight....literally. It is highly possible that by this Friday our dossier will be making its exit from America and arriving in Haiti! ( I won't say 100 percent because nothing is in this adoption process, but we have forward movement! Always better than backwards!!!)

After our struggles and frustrations trying to acquire our final approval it is so exciting to again feel some process being made.

I am hoping the next time I get around to updating our process I can affirm court dates and even more forward process.

I want to finish by giving credit where credit is due. I have cried, stressed, sobbed and cried some more during these trying months. God has been our only strength. Christ our rock. As I've been recently reading through the New Testament, I am impacted by the strength of Paul, who admits and preaches gladly while being in chains for Christ. The trial and persecution he faced far surpasses all I have endured during our adoption process. And I am called, as Paul was, to find joy in my trials. I am blessed to be able to lean fully into the word and love of the Lord during our journey. In no way has this adoption been easy, but we do call it pure joy to be able to follow the calling God has asked of me and Daniel. I have no doubt, complete and utter faith that He will do all things for His glory and bring good to those who love Him. He will bring our son home...

Prayers, as always, are so deeply welcomed and appreciated.
Love and blessings to all,
Terry

Monday, August 13, 2012

Waiting and Waiting...a Brief Update

I have not posted in awhile, but wanted to send out a thank you to those who donated to our Hand in Hand Matching Grant. We actually beat the amount!!! Praise God and thanks again for helping us with our adoption:)

On another note, some changes are going on in Haiti and it has brought the process to a slow crawl. I believe that the changes are good and will be very beneficial to children that are being adopted from Haiti, but for those of us already in process, well, we are stuck waiting for the changes to go into effect.

Haiti is becoming Hague Accredited, which means that they will follow different guidelines for allowing children to be adopted from their country. This is good and helps police potentially fraudulent adoptions. Also, all adoptions agencies must be approved by Haiti if they want to do adoptions from the country. No independent adoptions are allowed anymore.

If you are interested in learning more about the process, check out the America World website for information on the Haiti adoption changes.

So, in a nutshell, we are waiting on changes to be made before we can progress much further. I am in turmoil on a daily basis, knowing that the changes are beneficial, but heart broken for our little guy to come home. I cry, feel discouraged at times and am sometimes fearful. But I trust and have faith in a mighty God who is good to those who love Him. I love my LORD and will continue to trust that He will help us complete all dossier changes, make the Haiti/Hague
changes progress smoothly and bring us completely through our journey with a joyful end. It's the waiting that, on occassion, brings me down.

Prayers are always appreciated, not just for us and our process, but for our son, who is still living in an orphanage, not knowing the completeness of a loving family.

God Bless,
Terry

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

A Little 'Hand in Hand' Goes a Long Way

We have a son. He lives in an orphanage in Haiti. We have held him, hugged him and kissed him. He is real and he is part of our family. But...There are hoops to jump through, time to wait and alot of money that must be paid for us to bring him home. Trying to come up with the average working man's yearly salary is a daunting task for any family adopting. It is the one, large and scary obstacle that stands in the way.


We have been blessed, however, by Hand in Hand Christian Adoption, Inc. with a matching grant! What is this matching grant, you may ask? Well, if our family is able to fundraise up to $3000.00, Hand in Hand will match us another $3000.00! That's a total of $6000.00!
That is approximately 25% of what we need to help bring him home!


If you've been wondering how you can help our family out, please consider donating to us through the Hand in Hand matching grant account. You can send donations to:

Hand in Hand Christian Adoption, Inc.
Daniel and Teresa Lacey
18318 Mimosa Court
Gradner, KS 66030


Please make checks out to Hand in Hand and only put our names on the envelope. This is for tax deductible purposes. If you have any further questions you can contact me at 801-803-1449 or find more info at www.handinhandadopt.org.

Thanks so much to everyone who has given, even the smallest bit. We know that you are walking with us, praying for our little boy to come home. It takes a village to raise, love and bring home a child. God Bless you all:)

Much love,
Terry



Sleeping in his bunk at the orphanage.

Monday, April 23, 2012

April...A Time of Referral, Baptism and God's Work.


So many things seem to be happening full steam around me, but my brain and body are still on 'Haiti' time (as my friend Angie so rightly put it!). Things are whizzing past me and I don't feel like I'm hanging on very tight! In other words, too much to do and I have no sense of time!!!

But here are some things that have been going on in our village since we returned from Haiti on March 30.

Our official referral documents came in! We are in process of working (and waiting) on adding a sweet, cute, healthy 2 and a half year old boy to our family! Due to confidentiality reasons, I cannot post any other information about him. But he has a name and face! We have a son waiting for us in Haiti!

However, April has been filled with other amazing things. Tayler was baptized on Easter Sunday this year. All I can say is when your 15 1/2 year old son commits his life to Jesus and willingly gets baptised without poking, prodding or doing it because it's the rule, it is the most amazing experience for a parent. Seeing your child take ownership of his faith...well, I've been thanking God for drawing Tayler and making my son His child.

Also, I have to praise God and give Him glory for constantly walking with us. A small, but powerful story: Part of the paperwork that we received for the referral had the amount that we needed to pay up front to the agency. Weeeeeellllll....this very scatter-brained woman mis-read the statement and only sent in half the payment! EEK! We needed to send in twice as much. Well, our savings and personal loan had been tapped out so we were kind of sweating what to do. We had part of it in cash to send, but needed $800 more. I was getting to the point of selling, pawning, begging, whatever it would take.

Well, funny thing. Our credit card statement came in. The bank raised our limit. Can you guess how much??? $800 EXACTLY! Coincidence? I think not:) This has happened several times over the last 6 months since we started the adoption process. God has been opening doors. If people question why we are adopting or why are we allowing ourselves to go into debt again, I can honestly say God wants us to adopt! He will help us tie up the financial end as it comes at us. Some way, some how.

Anyway, that is a small update on what is up in this village:) I want to send a hug and thanks to our prayer warriors and financial supporters. I can NEVER put into words what it means to us. You are a HUGE part in helping to bring our little boy home!

(The pic is of Daniel and I holding him, but can't show his face so it's been cropped, but we got to meet him!!)
God Bless,
Terry

Thursday, April 5, 2012

My Reflections on Haiti



We have been back for nearly a week from Haiti and I've had time to absorb, think over and pray for all I experienced on our trip. There was so much, so overwhelming, I don't know that I can ever truly put into words what I lived that week.

The 1st day we were exposed to orphans at the facility for 'older' kids (5 and up) and I was unsure how I was going to react. This is something I've never before experienced in my life. Fortunately for me, the kids knew! They crawled all over us, loved on us, which in turn put me at ease and let my love for kids flow more smoothly.

The 2nd day we went to the baby facility. There were babies as young as 2 months old. I wondered what their futures would hold, brand new and innocent to the world, growing up institutionalized... I am hopeful for these babies however. People adopt babies more often than some of the 6, 7, or 8 year olds that we played with the day before.




Day 3 was diffucult. More diffucult than I can say, but I will try and convey what I mean. We went back to the older child facility and spent the day with them. Somewhere in the back of my mind, through the beadmaking, storytelling, games and coloring, I knew I would probably never see these kids again. I will never know what they become. A child in Haiti is like a wounded gazelle among the lions. My solace was in knowing that the Orphanage Director does his best to look out and provide for them. In an unstable nation, however, there are too many unknowns. I sobbed in the back of our taptap after 11 year old Lucina read Bible stories to me and I found myself clinging to the hope that Jesus was there and protecting these children. That somehow they would know and feel that. That no matter where their paths may take them, they have a Father in heaven who loves them, even when their parents could not.

The 4th day took us back to the baby facility and we again visited, colored with toddlers and held babies. By this day the team was so emotionally drained, it felt like we had nothing left to give. But the kids still managed to keep us busy and we spent a full day loving babies one more time. Holding babies that will never remember you has a profound effect. There is alot of disassociating and disconnecting that can happen within a child's brain if it is not held and loved in the early months of life. We felt blessed and privileged to do this for these babies.

Everyday as we drove through the city, I tried to take snapshots with my brain as well as the camera. I want to remember the colorful taptaps, the beautiful women carrying baskets on their heads, the men selling their goods on the roadsides, the uniformed school children walking to school. The piles of rubble and trash that litter the streets, the cows, goats, chickens...absolutely everything. In a week, all these pieces of Haiti, good, bad, beautiful and ugly, had worked their way into my blood. A week later, I am still longing for and miss Haiti. Why God, am I missing such a poor, needy nation?




He has repeatedly answered me: In a nation like Haiti, where people live day to day, the only hope they truly have is the hope that is provided through Christ. I felt God in Haiti like I never felt before. We can donate, visit, build and educate these people, but their hope truly only lies in the Haitian people coming to life through Christ.

God loves Haiti and it's people. I love Haiti. I pray He uses me to help spread His glory through my newfound home away from home.

God bless,
Terry

Monday, March 26, 2012

My First Haiti Experience

Haiti is a mix of incredible beauty and hideous poverty. The people are stunningly beautiful, smooth cocoa skin, big infectious smiles and they seem to exude an unshakable optimism.

Yet these same happy people are living in conditions that have forced some to make choices most Americans would never dream of having to make.

I spent the day with children who live at an orphanage. Children who's parents are deceased or have relinquished their parental rights. A deceased parent cannot make a choice, but those who relinquish rights have had to make an agonizing choice due to circumstances they find themselves in: earthquake, job situation, or the countless other reasons they cannot care for their kids.

Whatever the circumstance, I cannot fathom having to make the choice these parents had to make. Nor can I imagine being the child left in an unknown place without the only comfort ever known.

With all that stated, my first experience with these orphans was....undescribable. Unless you do it for yourself, nothing I say can convey the varying emotions you feel interacting with orphans.


I hugged precious little girls with pretty braided hair. I tied their ribbons in when they fell out.I told them I loved them because they would tell me first, looking up at me with their big, brown eyes. We blew bubbles, colored pictures, handed out snacks and played jump rope.

Our fabulous group of men had the sports arena covered! They played soccer, baseball, basketball and frisbee. I think there was even some wrestling matches going down with some of the older boys! It was a fun time with a spunky group of kids.

It was almost a perfect day. The hard thing was leaving them there, knowing that, even though the staff does it's best for these kids, these little ones don't have a mommy or daddy to tuck them in, no parents to reassure them that they will be there in the morning and that they are a vital part of a loving family. I cannot think of anything on Earth more important to a child than a families unconditional love.

I am excited and looking forward to the remaining days of our Haiti trip with these kids. I get to be a small part of showing unconditional love to kids that don't experience that. I am more motivated than ever for our adoption to be completed and for our child to come home.

But honestly, I am most excited to see how God is going to change me and our entire team to forever reach out and touch the lives of orphans in Haiti and around the whole world.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

The Light at the End of the Dossier Tunnel



Well, it's almost complete.

The stack of paperwork that is approximately 6 inches high that details every little thing that is the Lacey family.

Birth certificates, marriage license, sheriff's letters, reference letters, medical letters, taxes and bank letters, bank statements, homestudy, psychological evaluation...the list could go on and on.

Well, we will be shipping off that stack of paperwork in the next few days to our adoption agency and we will be through the thickest part of the 'paper chase'.

And although it has been alot of work trying to round up all of the paperwork, I don't regret or wish it had been easier. It actually had the affect I think God meant for it to have. It has tested our strength and, after reading our very positive and encouraging homestudy, has shown we have what it takes to add another member to our family.

As Daniel and I get ready to set off to Haiti this weekend, I realize that God's timing in all of this has been perfect. Our paperwork labor has paid off and our homestudy is being sent to the orphanage (if it hasn't arrived already) so that the Orphanage Director can be working on a referral for us. We may quite possibly be meeting our son this weekend if they don't require more of our 'official dossier' to be submitted wholly first. I am keeping my fingers crossed, but God has timed everything beautifully. If we have to wait, of course we will, if not...well, I can't wait to meet our Oscar next week!

Please pray for our trip to Foyer de Sion orphanage, the children there and the team that is going to serve them. May it have a positive impact on these kids and may they all find a loving home. The need is great, so pray that others rise up to help be the 'care in their time of distress.'

God Bless and thanks to all the support that has come in during this exciting time in our lives!
Terry

Monday, February 27, 2012

Conference Call #1 and my Cool Hubby













Some information that Daniel and I got last night on our 1st conference call concering our upcoming trip to Haiti:








-The entire team of 12 people will be flying together to Florida. The team consists of 9 men and 3 women.
Let me take a minute to state here the significance of this number. 9 men. More men than women. On a mission trip that is focused all on playing and interacting with children. In a country where children relate to men as unstable and violent, the love and compassion that these 9 men will bring to the orphans will be profound. Anyone who works with children in any capacity knows the impact that good men can have in a child's life. I feel blessed to see first-hand how these men play, love on and bless these kids!







-The guest home we were originally going to stay in was booked full! So a change in plans to our housing is being worked out at this time. Apparently the accomodations that are being done are quite similar to the original. Not alot of difference, just more work for our poor family coordinator!










-Immunizations. Ugh. That's complete this week for both Daniel and I.









-Airfare. Wouldn't you know it. Daniel and I are the only 2 on the trip that they can't book a same day flight into Florida. So it is looking like we may have to do an overnighter in Dallas before we fly into Florida on the 25th. Oh well, that's life.











-We will have the option to raise funds or bring items to donate to the orphanage. Formula is much needed for their infant/toddler facility and am thinking of purchasing cans to take down with us.










-I am most excited about this! We get to actually plan out activities to do with the children! I am stoked to use my past experiences working with children to see if I can pull off days of fun and interaction! My brain is going a mile a minute on what kinds of fun arts, crafts, games, sports and Bible teachings I can bring to these kids!








-DON'T OPEN YOUR MOUTH IN THE SHOWER! and of course only drink bottled water:)










I think the coolest thing about this whole day leading up to our conference call was a call that I got from Daniel about an hour and a half before.







He found out that a 'poker' friend of his knows a family that recently adopted 2 Haitian children. He said how important it is for us to contact them and know their story. How important it will be for Oscar to know a family that is culturally-similarly structured to ours. I love my hubby. He is soooo smart. He's falling more in love with our Oscar:)











All glory to God. He's doing things right in front of my eyes that some days I can barely believe. If you've considered adopting, don't worry. He's gonna carry you.










God Bless and much love!




Terry










Sunday, February 12, 2012

There Are No Coincidences

It's been so busy that I haven't had the time (and sometimes the energy) to blog lately. But wanted to update those who haven't heard on our exciting news:


I don't believe in coincidences. I think when something amazing happens, it is God throwing open a door where one had been closed previously. So often He does not get the credit or glory for it.

Let me share one of God's miraculous 'coincidences' with you all that has happened within the last month since the previous post:

One of Daniel's greatest issues with the entire adoption process was that we don't get to 'pick' our child. He was hoping to identify a child when we go on a missions trip with Shadow Mountain Church to Haiti in November. He simply misunderstood the referral process. After the Homestudy process is complete (hopefully the beginning of March), we will get a picture and information on a child the agency and orphange think would be a good match to our family and, hypothetically, we could reject that child, but that only means the waiting process starts all over again. I can't tell you how much this hurts my heart when I think of 'Oscar' waiting for us longer, and us waiting to bring him home.

So after a full day (January 19) of talking, praying, talking, asking God what to do, talking, arguing, praying...you get the point, I realized that if I have to wait longer, I will have to wait longer. Daniel MUST be comfortable, bond and connect with the child we select. I had to come to terms that I am not driving this adoption bus, God is. If His work in Daniel took longer, I had to exercise patience.

Miracle in the works:


THE NEXT DAY, (Jan. 20th) I received and email from America World (our adoption agency) with information on an upcoming trip to Haiti. During this trip a group of 20 would spend time at America Worlds PARTNER orphanage, playing, interacting and spending time with the children. We would also get to do small projects around the orphanage if needed. America World wanted to offer spots on the trip to families adopting from Haiti before opening up and advertising the trip to others.



PARTNER ORPHANAGE???? Um, THE orphanage that our 'Oscar' will come from??? I sat stunned looking at the email. The enormity of the email struck me immediately.



Playing and interacting with the children. Among the approximately 80 children that the orphanage houses, there is 'Oscar.' These will be the children that our referral comes from!



I believe God knew Daniel needed to visually see and bond with the children. He opened an opportunity that not only will allow Daniel to feel comfortable with our choice, but is giving us an opportunity as a couple to meet and spend time with our child.



There are no coincidences. There are only doors and opportunities that God puts before us. We jumped at the chance and I emailed Michelle at America World and said YES!



So now the journey of prepping for an upcoming trip (March 25 thru March 30) to Haiti begins. God has opened the door. I won't lie. I'm petrified. I've never been out of the US. I've never seen poverty on such a devastating level. I've never met an orphan in my life. I'm uncomfortable. Daniel is scared.


But we will go. God never said it would be easy. But when He calls, we go. We are scared, but we obey.

As we draw closer to completing our homestudy and dossier, things are picking up speed and 'Oscar' is becoming more than just a name that I gave so that my kids could identify. He's becoming real. He's becoming family. The unknown of it all is scary...but we are walking through God's open door.

God Bless,


Terry:)

Thursday, January 19, 2012

A Village Facts and 'Heart' Update



So, the nitty gritty facts of our progress as is follows:








*We have put in for our passports. (we were waiting on a currently issued drivers license) They should be arriving in approximately 4 to 6 weeks.




*I have handed out 3 templates for reference letters, 1 coming from Pastor Cory, 1 from Matt and Carrie and 1 from a teacher (Lori McCarty, teacher and my good friend) who taught one of our kids since they are school aged and Haiti requires that of parents with school aged children.





*Typed up my verification of employment letter from the school.





*Talked to the bank about getting a letter and statements notarized same day (this will will be acquired tomorrow.)





*Contacted a Homestudy agency (a couple times and hope they will soon respond! I would like this to be done by the end of February!)





And I could go on and on and on with the little details....now for the 'heart' update.






The 'heart' update is really about where we, as a couple, are at in this whole journey. And I'm learning that this consists of the way that I deal and see our adoption process versus how Daniel deals and sees our adoption process.





Make no mistake, both of us are 100% committed to bringing this little boy home, but as a friend so accurately explained to me during a vent session...I am a 'pregnant', expecting mother. My 'nesting' instinct is in full swing...Daniel (obviously since he's male) doesn't have that same instinct. (I think this may come from the fact that I believe I have what I like to refer to as a 'mother's' heart for orphans and kids in need. I have to remind myself ((and often bite my tongue)) that not all peoples of this world have this heart.)





As my friend so kindly reminded me, for a dad, sometimes the 'reality' of their fatherhood comes when the child physically enters the world. Our Oscar has not 'physically' entered Daniels world yet. This will come, as Daniel's pointed out to me, when we have a referral and a face to put with our "Oscar." Then he will 'allow' himself to get attached to the child...But as we continue to process paperwork, answer questions, decide what the next, best step to take is, it is still not quite as 'real' to him as it is for me. He no less loves his son in Haiti, he's just processing it, allowing it to affect him, in a different way than I am.





So, again as my friend pointed out, since he is and does deal with the coming of our child in his own way, I must give my husband the grace and the love he deserves to deal and grow as a soon to be father (again!) (thank you Lori for your immense wisdom!)






As a believer in the power of prayer, I pray often for Daniel to finally 'get' me. To get why I talk about the adoption, talk about orphans, talk about Haiti and all the cultural info tidbits I learn...why I talk so much about Oscar...I pray God will use our trip to Haiti to help reveal some of these things to him and I invite our followers and readers of this blog to pray along with me. I also ask for prayer for more grace for myself. To be patient with him when I don't think he's 'quite where he needs to be!' God will bring Daniel to it. I don't remember the last time the LORD has ever needed my help in any situation!







Also, a hearty thanks to those who read and keep abreast of how things are going. This blog has not only been a great way to keep friends and family updated, but a way to help the Lacey's emotionally process this journey.





God Bless,



Terry